We’ve all heard the quoted line from the charming Ryan Gosling in The Notebook when he screams at his love interest, “what do you want?!”

Have you ever sat and genuinely thought about that question? I feel like sometimes what I or someone else might want can get mixed up between moral values, the fear of judgement, and just societal norms. There is so much influence around us with social media, friends and family, higher education, that sometimes we don’t even think for ourselves; we just think about what others want us to be. So, lets remove it all. Cut it back. Remove what fears that you may have, what external judgements or inputs, and be honest, ask yourself – what do you want? Let me share.

I want to be a badass. Not some boring person that followed the status quo. Not the kid who did exactly what his parents streamlined for him since he was 3 years old. I want to carve my own path. I want to find success on my own. I want my journey to be personal – so personal that the failures brand a lasting sting and the successes are loud and demand praise. 

I want to be influential and inspirational. Not necessarily for other people but for who I once was. I want that talented 12 year old kid that dreamed and dreamed to look up and see what he did, and realize that the potential he had at a young age wasn’t wasted. 

I want peace. Peace of mind, internal peace. No more ego battles. No more fighting myself. I want to be who I am and not let fear of who others want me to be fight against who I truly am. I want to be original. I want to be myself. I want that peace of knowing that I can be who I am with guilt and without caring what others think.

I want to chase something so crazy, so unrealistic, that the majority of people just wouldn’t understand the need. I can honestly say that the last thing I want is to continue to wake up and feel a sense of unfulfillment. I want to fill that personal void with an idea so unconventional and outlandish that I never have to ask myself the question of – what else I could have done with my life?

Are those all the things that I want in my life? Absolutely not. Why should they be? I’m a dreamer. There is always something more to hope for, something more to dream. But dreams need to start somewhere, and where they start is from the internal conscious speaking to the heart and mind. So get out a piece of paper and write. Scribble some thoughts down. Remember to be honest with yourself. Be a little selfish, this isn’t about anyone else. At the end, take a deep breath, because now, the real work begins.